TAKE THAT, NAKATOMI

The Troubies blow up Die Hard, Heart-style —
and it’s pure holiday mayhem

The Troubadour Theater Company — the Troubies — has been wreaking musical-comedy havoc around Los Angeles since 1995, and their latest spoof, Die Heart: The Director’s Cut, might be the most gloriously unhinged holiday offering they’ve detonated yet. Their formula hasn’t changed and shouldn’t: take a beloved movie or classic text, mash it together with songs from a rock or pop legend, rewrite the lyrics so nothing is sacred, and then perform the whole thing with enough commedia dell’arte slapstick to wake the neighbors.

Matt Walker and Clinton Roane

Matt Walker, the company’s artistic director, directs, choreographs, adapts, and stars as the world’s most unlikely John McClane — wearing fake pecs, oversized bare feet, and the self-confidence of someone who knows he’ll break the fourth, fifth, and sixth walls before intermission. Every other scene seems to pause so Walker can toss in a Die Hard callback, a political jab, or a meta aside aimed directly at whoever happens to be making eye contact. It’s very Troubies, and very funny.

Luis Martinez, Benji Kauman, Rick Batalla, Trey McIntyre, Philip McNiven

The whole parody is backed by the four-piece Troubadorchestra, led by music director Ryan Whyman, who tears into Heart’s catalog as if the Wilson sisters personally blessed this chaos. And honestly? They might.

John Paul Batista, Chelle Denton and Sofia Joanna

The cast, a baker’s dozen of players who never stop moving, mugging, or improvising, throws itself into the madness with joyful abandon. Beth Kennedy splits her time between Deputy Chief Robinson and her iconic Troubies alter ego, the long-fingered Winter Warlock — stilts and all. Chelle Denton channels Holly, McLane’s wife, with big hair and bigger vocals. Rick Batalla, in leather pants and villainous glee, turns Hans Gruber into someone who would absolutely stop mid-terrorist plot to admire himself in a reflective surface.

Beth Kennedy and Matt Walker

The supporting ensemble keeps the stage in constant motion: Mike Sulprizio juggles Takagi/James/FBI; Clinton Roane drives more imaginary vehicles than a Universal Studios tram; John Paul Batista leans into Ellis/Uli’s coked-up bravado; Philip McNiven’s Karl appears to be smuggling an entire bratwurst factory in his tights as he leaps across the stage in a nod to Bolshoi Ballet dancer Alexander Godunov, who played Karl the Terrorist in the film; Trey McIntyre, Benji Kaufman, Luis Martinez, Sofia JoAnna, and Lara Lafferty round out the troupe, with big belter Lafferty morphing from knee-walking child to Heart-style backup singer at whiplash speed.

Rick Batalla and Clinton Roane

The jokes land because the ensemble commits to every absurdity — Nerf-gun battles, security-camera bits, running gags about 1980s politics, and whatever else they improvise in the moment. The Troubies know their audience, which is why half the house is laughing at the same movie references and the other half is laughing at the actors making fun of the movie references.

(front) Matt Walker, Chelle Denton, (back) John Paul Batista, Rick Batalla, Luis Martinez

Songs by Heart (Ann Wilson and Nancy Wilson) — “Kick It Out” (the opening rally), “Barracuda” (Batalla referencing himself and his band of terrorists), “Straight On,” “Crazy on You” (great duel by Walker and Denton), “Magic Man,” and others — all get lyric makeovers so they serve the plot, or at least acknowledge the plot before sprinting in the opposite direction. The choreography is appropriately big, goofy, and played to the back wall.

Philip McNiven, Rick Batalla, Matt Walker and Chelle Denton

The technical team fully understands the assignment. Eric Heinly supervises the music; Douglas Leadwell’s costumes bring out every cliché the 1980s ever produced; Suzanne Narbonne’s wigs are a show unto themselves; Bo Tindell’s lighting, Robert Arturo Ramirez’s sound, German Diaz’s outrageous props feed the madness; Rick Batalla moonlights as video designer, and Corey Lynn Womack wrangles the entire circus as stage manager.

The Troubies dedicate this show to the victims and first responders of the Palisades, Altadena, and Malibu fires — a touching note amid the anarchy.

Rick Batalla and Matt Walker

This is not a quiet night at the theatre. This is not a reflective holiday journey. This is a 90-minute (plus intermission for “peeing, refilling drinks, and purchasing merchandise”) explosion of unfiltered Troubies energy. If you’re a fan, you already have tickets. If you’re new, just know that the show starts at exactly the scheduled time — and they will roast you if you wander in late. YIPPEE-KI-YAY!

Philip McNiven, Matt Walker and Rick Batalla

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photos by Ashley Erikson

Die Heart: The Director’s Cut
The Colony Theatre, 555 N. Third St., Burbank
ends on December 21, 2025
Thurs–Fri at 8; Sat at 4 & 8; Sun at 4 & 7:30
for tickets ($35–$60), call 818.558.7000 or visit Troubies or Colony Theatre,
or call (818) 558-7000

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